|
|
|
#1
03-08-2010, 02:25 PM
|
||||
|
||||
todays funny
Bob came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.
He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Bob.' Bob was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!' St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.' Bob was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home... The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking and pecking the ground. A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?' 'Not bad,' replied Bob the hen, 'but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm gonna explode!' 'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster. 'Don't tell me you've never laid an egg before? ' 'Never,' said Bob. 'Well, just relax and let it happen,' says the rooster. 'It's no big deal.' He did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg! He was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg -- his joy was overwhelming. As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard..... "BOB, wake up! You just shit the bed!" I can relate lol Im taking CHANTIX to quit smoking and have vivid dreams.
__________________
 "As I lay rubber down the street, I pray for traction I can keep, but if I spin and begin to slide, please dear God protect my ride." -Amen US NAVY RETIRED 
|
|
#3
03-09-2010, 12:07 AM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Hahahahaha
__________________
2000 SS Th350, FTI 4200 stall , cam, full bolt-ons, 150 wetshot, Moser 9inch/locker/4.11s, Slowhawk tuned. 493rwhp 570rwtq. 10.97 @ 127.7 1.58 60' and M6 10.84 @ 126.3 1.55 60' Th350 SOLD BUT NOT FORGOTTEN New Toy - 06 Torrid Red Gto M6. 231/242 cam, Kooks, magnaflow, GForce, Monster stg2, lingenfelter cai, 411rwhp 385rwtq. 12.40@111
|
|
#4
03-09-2010, 02:05 AM
|
|||
|
|||
|
hahah gotten alcohol poisening a few times but never had dreams quite like that lol
__________________
2009 CBR 600RR- The toy 2009 Chevy 1500- The DD 2012 Corrola- Wife's gas sipper.
|
|
#5
03-09-2010, 02:40 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
hahaha wow thats pretty gross
__________________
 1986 Camaro Iroc z28 305 TPI 700R4 -hooker-edelbrock 1 5/8" shorty headers-1.6 roller rockers-52mm TB-3.23 10 bolt- ...191rwhp/280rwtq...14.97@90.5 2.04 60' 2005 GMC Sierra 2500 LLY Duramax -exhaust-gauges-leveled-wheels-tune-egr delete....339rwhp/637rwtq
|
|
#6
03-09-2010, 03:57 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
i had a dream like that once
__________________
Tony "Mr. Camaro" Quadros
~ 95 z28 350ci LT1 ~ "Just another bolt on only LT1 that can kick ur LS1's a$$!" Special thx: Frank Cahill, Noyzee Racing, Coastal Customs, Shon Herron, John P. (1slowformula) Cecil - 11.998 @ 111.02mph 1.635 60ft ... 1/8th 7.588 @ 89.33mph
|
|
#7
03-10-2010, 04:57 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
hahahahaha
|
|
#8
03-10-2010, 05:24 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! That hit was fuckin funny. I was totally expecting some kind of sex joke.
Never been that drunk. Had alcohol poisoning way more than once tho.
__________________
 2001 Navy Blue Metallic Z28 hardtop. M6, black Z06 wheels(17x9.5 fronts/18x10.5 rears), Thunder 224cam, Kooks 1 7/8 stainless headers/ypipe, Magnaflow exhaust, Hurst shifter, SLP CAI/lid, K&N air filter, Manley double roller timing chain, 160stat, Thunder ported oil pump, SPEC Stage 3+ clutch w/billet flywheel, Powerstop cross-drilled/slotted rotors, and SLOWHAWK TUNED!!! SLOWHAWK IS THE MUTHAFUCKIN MAN!
|
|
#9
03-10-2010, 05:27 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
BAHAHAHAAHAH FINALLY HAD THE TIME TO READ THIS!!!! EPIC!!!!
__________________
 1998 Firebird:buncha parts thats used to make it go fast..... not so much anymore.  BAAAAAA!!!!!!
|
 |
|
|
~*Maddie*~
Snake
Hybrid Mode
